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Sep 17, 2018

Chloé is pregnant and now feeling possessive of her husband. Should she ask her metamour to find someone else to date so she's not so in love with Chloé's husband?

0:00 Introduction and host chat

Under 18? Stop listening now and visit

2:00 Poly in the news

An article came out in TIME Magazine, What Monogamous Couples Can Learn from Polyamorous Relationships, According to Experts, and it’s amazingly good! Here’s how poly folks can school monos, according to the article:

  • Communication
  • Defining the relationship
  • Practicing safe sex
  • Managing jealousy
  • Maintaining a sense of independence

Read Alan’s writeup of this article as well as his exhaustive roundup post of similar past articles.

14:00 Poly and pregnant

Chloé and her husband each have a long-distance relationship outside their own, which they see a few times a year. She is now pregnant and feeling more territorial about her husband. She’s finding she wants her metamour not to be so in love with Chloé’s husband and to find her “own” primary.

  • Your feelings won’t change if your metamour finds someone else, because they are YOUR feelings. Your insecurity is yours to own and manage.
  • Try the And then what jealousy exercise as well as reviewing the other content we’ve done on jealousy.
  • Look inwards to your own feelings instead of outward at your metamour.
  • Your instinct to find a poly support network. Look both in life and online; we recommend the Poly Families Yahoo group.
  • Phone, video, or in-person are the best media for relationship conversations.

22:30 Feedback

Friggin Limey wrote a response to episode 558 on deciding when to give up on poly. He has given up on poly and decided that monogamy is what he needs.

24:30 Happy Poly Moment

Kimberly writes in with a happy poly moment about her partner moving in with the family! She also asks about when and how to come out at work with her new job—should she bring her poly family to the “bring your family” event occurring before she starts?

31:15 Thank you!

Welcome to Matthew and Jeff as new Poly Weekly Playmates!

32:00 How to make this podcast better

Questions? Comments? Feedback? Email and attach an audio comment or call the listener comment line at 802-505-POLY. If you want us to teach a class at your event, want us to coach you, or want to appear on the podcast, email

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